Highway to Hell

I have found my new hell on Earth and it’s the Molly Pitcher rest stop off the New Jersey Turnpike. When I was younger I used to love to stop at these rest areas because it got me out of the backseat of the cars where I had to listen to my parents jazz music or static stations. I would get out and get some fries at McDonalds and stretch my legs. There was always a bunch of license plates from states all around the country that I could check off while playing the license plate game.  I thought it was so cool that there was like a food court and a mall right off the highway!

When I was in my 20s I had horrible panic attacks on the highway so these rest stops were always my sanity check points where I could breathe and get a milkshakes and have at least ten minutes where I wasn’t afraid of getting hit by a mack truck.

Now that I am older I dread stopping at these places and if I was someone who was comfortable peeing on the side of the highway I would much prefer that.

On Saturday, we stopped off at Molly Pitcher for a quick breakfast and bathroom break. I had on a pretty dress, makeup done, hair looking great and when I stepped foot into the women’s room, I thought for sure I had walked from New Jersey straight into the crowded streets of Mumbai or something. Toilet paper streaming all over the floor, wet and dirty paper towels all over the sinks, mothers changing their babies diapers, people standing right in front of your stall looking in to the three inch gap between the lock and the door.

I actually said out loud “I am way too pretty to pee here.” When I walked to the sink I said “I have found my new hell.” I got some strange looks but I know for sure I was not the strange one in the room.

Do people really look this frazzled in their cars? Is it just that as soon as they park their cars they turn into zombies or all of a sudden forget how to speak English or know how to walk in a straight line? I understand when you get back from the moon, it takes a bit of adjustment but not sure why walking from your caravan to Cinnabon why all forms of common sense and cleanliness go out the window. If you threw those things out while driving you would be fined!


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