Chew on this

I have misophonia. I love coming up with new things that I have. I could put all of these different aliments together after my name and it would like Laura R. Goldberg, ADO.CDBPM.OSPH. You get the picture.

What is misophonia? It’s the hatred of the sound of chewing and I need a cure! When I have to listen to people chew it has this crazy effect on me. It makes me mental. It makes me want to punch a wall. It makes me feel like I have bugs crawling all over me. It makes me want to take the plate of salad away from the person near me and throw it out the window. And it’s not personal. I know I make a lot of sounds chewing too but I can’t handle when other people do.

I grew up sitting down for dinner every night with no TV or music and I had to listen to everyone chew every night. I don’t even know what to do with myself during these dinners when all I hear is the sound of slurping and chewing and lip smacking. It’s worse than a nail on a chalkboard (not that anyone uses chalkboards anymore).

And it’s not only the chewing. It’s the sounds of hands in a bag of popcorn at the movie theatre or a person trying to get a chip out of a bag. I had to move seats three times once in a movie because people were making too much noise with their popcorn. It’s not that hard people. Put your hand in, scoop some in and then gently place in your mouth.

The funny thing is that the sound of Fred chewing carrots, or anything really, is one of my favorite sounds in the world. There is nothing cuter to me. Or the sound of him chewing his nylabone. It relaxes me so much. The more Fred chews and opens is mouth and the longer it takes him to chew, the better and cuter it is.

And there is research on this.


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