Mole(ster)

I had my annual dermatologist appointment a few days ago. Once I find something on my skin, I become obsessed on it until someone tells me it is ok. It can be anything. It could be a pen mark and I will worry about it until it comes off in the shower.

I had two basil cells removed from my face a bunch of years ago and Dr. Frankenstein left the biggest scars on my face, which I have come to be okay with. But since then anytime there is anything, I’m like “just take it off.” I’ve had two removed from my back.

This time, however, this appointment seemed particularly violating. I am not sure why. I was able to keep on my bra and underwear but I still felt so exposed. Maybe it was the 25 year old frat dude that was the doctor’s assistant? That definitely could have been it. He stood there the whole time on is iPad and I have no idea what he was looking at. Was he looking at porn? Was he looking at my old chart? Was he playing tetris? I have no idea. But it was really weird having him there the entire time. A few times I made some jokes and looked at him just to see if I could get a reaction and I didn’t get a single one.

The doctor took her big light and magnifying glass and looked over my body. She asked about the weather. I was thinking “maybe you could look at my moles rather than wonder about the weather.” She skipped over the little freckle on my foot I was worried about so I made sure she went back to that.

Then it came time for my butt. I have a new mole on my butt which I hate and of course I am worried about. It’s nothing. At least, according to the doctor. And the frat dude, I am pretty sure he took a photo on his iPad and shared it with his 12 roommates later that day.

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